I’ve been considerably more lax in posting on this site than I had hoped, and I’m sorry.  There was this little football draft
this weekend, but that’s just a lame excuse.  And not only that, but mlb.tv has proven that they really, truly hate my ass by being down for the past three days.  Seriously, if these guys weren’t a monopoly, they would’ve been out of business 85 years ago.  Incompetence is an understatement.  Even interns would do a better job than these asswipes.  OK, I feel a little better, now only if I get my $120 back.

So, now that I have apologized and begged for forgiveness, I wanted to take a quick tour of the leagues.

Hey, here’s a nice bar bet for ya: which team has the best winning percentage in the so-badass-fox-goes-crazy-with-love American League?  The Yankees???!  Why, no!  Oh, of course, it’s the Red Sawks.  Ummmm, no…..  Tigers?  Not so much.

That’s right, peeps, the Athletics have the best record in the AL.  No, they won’t keep it up, but they aren’t quite as nauseating as people thought.  I really wish I would’ve done a full league preview because the As are my pick for the AL West.  Between the Mariners and the Rangers, you’ve got a couple of really crappy teams to beat up on if you are the As.  Fortunately for the As, they got to start with a weak AL Central.

So……is the AL still the best thing in the universe Evar!?

In the NL, the Diamondbacks have the best record.  I think they’ll have the best record in baseball at the end of the season, as well.  It’s just a perfect storm of a team: Brandon Webb, Danny Haren, and a young, destructive offense.

But the Florida Marlins are leading the NL East?  Yes, it’s true.  Oddly, they have been equal opportunity badasses, picking on whomever gets in their way.  Mets?  Suck.  Braves?  Nationals?  Pshaw.

A big reason has been Scott “Psycho” Olsen, who suddenly understands that battling the opposition is far better than picking fights with your own teammates.

And if you are a Mets fan, precisely how suicidal are you?  Are you Lizzie Borden, where you want to kill and die in the chair?  Are you Kurt Cobain?  Or, *drat*, are you Jeffery Dahmer-esque?  Yeah, the Mets are 13-11, good for 2nd in the NL LEast, but the team isn’t instilling the fear I thought it would.  Carlos Delgado had a couple of bombs today, but there was talk that he would be released.  I can’t tell you how stupid that would be, but we are talking about the Mets here.

I’ve been writing about the Astros quite a bit, but I wanted to take a moment to talk about the rest of the baseballers in the league.  What you say?

Unfortunately, because I’m at work and even though I live 150 miles from Houston, the Reds/Stros game at 11 CDT will be blacked out on mlb.tv.

Because of that, I’ll be missing a fantastic matchup between the Astros en fuego offense versus one of the hottest young arms in the league, Johnny Cueto.  I’ve been able to watch two of Cueto’s starts, and he is delightful to watch.

Also, I hope to be able to post a little more soon.  Damn kids got me sick, and I have been fighting some horrendous crap the last couple of days.  Ugh.

First, major {hugs} to Matt for the new design. If I wasn’t a married, straight man, I would so fall in love with him.

This week’s edition of Rights and Wrongs will be the last to solely look at the year as a whole. I figure, three weeks in, it’s time to look at things at a micro view from here on out. That said, let’s hit that shit!!!!

Offense:

Ummmm, holy shit? Towles is hitting for major power, Berkman has been good, and Tejada still thinks he’s 25 instead of 104 years old. Yet, Aaron Cook can kick our ass? One of my biggest worries is that Pence and Bourn have whiff rates that would make Dave Kingman blush.

My biggest worry, however, is that (before today’s game) your Houston Astros are dead last in OBP. Last. Done. Dead. As a baseball stat geek, it’s important to know why that’s, ummmmmm, important. Here’s the deal: OPS should be 1.6 OPS + 1 SLG. The reason is that there is really only one fixed variable in baseball, and that is there are only three outs per inning. That’s what makes not making outs so important. And, right now, we are making a shitload of outs.

We are slugging like mad, at least, as we clock in almost in the middle there (considering our batting average, that’s quite a feat).  Until we start seeing more pitches and drawing more walks, the offense will under-perform.

Note: I started this post last (Sunday) night, but I was too exhausted to complete the sucker.  This is where I stopped, so I am going to cheat a bit going forward.

Pitching:

Now, I predict Roy will have a nicely solid start against the Padres Monday night, going seven innings with 6 Ks.  OK, maybe that’s too much cheating.  Anyway, it’s nice to have you back, Roy.  You were sorely missed.

Wandy?  Is that you?  He has been a total badass this year, but, sadly, he’ll be sitting out the next couple of weeks with a….strained groin.  The only words I hate typing more than “strained groin” are “anal fissures.”  Well, the latter is actually kinda fun.  I mean, how often do you get to type “anal” in a baseball blog that’s not about Barry Bonds?

Shawn Chacon has been on fire, as well.  But, he scares me.  His current BA against is .220 while his career mark is .259, and he’s been at .272 and .265 the last two seasons.  We can expect regression to the mean here.  If he can cut back on his walks, though, he could make up for the BA against rate hike.  Still, a pleasant surprise.

All 41 years of Doug Brocail is having a career year.  He picked up a save earlier in the week, but he’s far more valuable in his current role than he his collecting those shiny round objects known as saves.  My biggest worry, and you’ve heard this before, is that he’s on a pace to pitch in 80+ games.  We’re starting to move past the whole small sample size factor on this, and at 41 yo, this pace is simply untenable.

Geoff Geary (wha???) and Wesley Wright have both done yeoman’s work in middle relief.  Wright may turn out to be the best Rule V pickup this year.  With a little more control, he really could be something special.

Dave Borkowski, Brandon Backe, Brian “Scuffy” Moehler, and Chris Sampson all have WHIPs above 1.7.  Moehler and Sampson are scary, Backe is basically rehabbing from Tommy John surgery in the majors, and, I swear, Borkowski means “pour gasoline on fire” in Polish.

Jose Valverde?  Watching him pitch reminds me of this:

(Stolen without permission from this awesome post from USS Mariner).

The hometown heroes are 9-12 after this evening’s drubbing of the Pa-dregs.  That’s a pace for a 69-93 record.  I still believe that our season hinges on Roy’s health: tonight’s start gives the much used pen a needed rest.  I’m worried about the workload the pen is having to take.

And that’s all I’ve got to say about that.  HAPPY ANAL FISSURES TO YOU ALL!!!

Title in honor of Edward Lorenz.

Ed Wade took over as GM of the Astros in September 2007. From points raised in the Lying Liar discussion, let’s take a quick look at some of deals he’s pulled off, specifically, those that have a Miggy Tejada-esque impact (Caveat: I think we can safely assume that Drayton is one of the most meddling owners in baseball, so this needs to be considered when appraising GM performance).

11/7/07 - Acquired OF Michael Bourn, nonroster 3B Michael Costanzo and RHP Geoff Geary from the Phillies in exchange for RHP Brad Lidge and SS Eric Bruntlett.

• Bourn has been Bourn: good speed, lots of SBs, and good D. His 697 OPS is Kaz Matsu-esque, though. In other words, he’s like Assmass with speed in CF.
• Michael Costanzo: Became part of the Tejada deal. Struggling to make contact in AAA, and a B/B- level prospect.
• Geoff Geary: Has been solid this year, though his BABIP (Batting average balls in play) is entirely unsustainable. Still, he’s been one of our better RPs this year.
• Brad Lidge: Injured, struggling with control, but he’s got a pair of saves and a 0 ERA.
• Eric Bruntlett: Has seen a lot of action thanks to Jimmy Rollins’ injury, which over-exposes him. One of the better utility infielders in the game, and somebody I was sad to see go.

11/16/07 - Acquired RHP Oscar Villarreal from the Braves in exchange for OF Josh Anderson

• Oscar: I really thought this would be Wade’s best deal, but Villareal is looking old and used. I expect some regression to the mean (so he gets better), but that Villareal has seen action in half our games is not a positive sign.
• Josh Anderson is Michael Bourn with less stick.

12/2/07 - Signed free agent 2B Kazuo Matsui to a three-year contract.

• I have not hidden my contempt for this deal. Signing a 32-yo 2b to a 3-year deal who has never hit outside of Coors Field - literally - is disastrous on so many levels. Kaz is due to make his Astros debut tonight.

12/12/07 - Acquired SS Miguel Tejada from the Baltimore Orioles in exchange for OF Luke Scott, RHP Matt Albers, LHP Troy Patton, RHP Dennis Sarfate and 3B Mike Costanzo; Claimed RHP Ryan Houston off waivers from the Toronto Blue Jays; Did not offer a 2008 contract to SS Adam Everett, making him a free agent.

• Tejeda is playing like he’s 25, though he’s really 34.
• Luke Scott: Scott scuffled horribly in the 1st half of 2007, but he put up a 978 OPS in the 2nd half. This year, he’s at 1.056. You shouldn’t be surprised.
• Albers: Was one of my favorite pitchers to watch last year thanks to his 95 MPH fastball that darted. He was pretty awful in 2007, but he’s been outstanding in the early going in Baltimore. I think he’s a legit #2 or #3 starter with his stuff.
• Troy Patton: dead.
• Sarate was outstanding for us at the end of 2007, but he has struggled with Baltimore.
• Costanzo, again, has struggled for contact.

12/14/07 - Acquired RHP Jose Valverde from the Arizona Diamondbacks in exchange for INF Chris Burke and RHP Juan Gutierrez and RHP Chad Qualls.

• Jose Valverde: The Latino Lidge (except that, you know, Lidge has been good)
• Chris Burke: Has been awful in a utility role, that I do not think suits him.
• Gutierrez: Especially considering park context, he has been a very solid starter for the Tucson Sidewinders. Still no more than a #3 or #4 starter, but he’s got some potential.
• Qualls: Same as it ever was with Qualls, who is still one of the top middle relievers in the game. Has also picked up a save to go with that 0 ERA.

So, what’s been the effect?

IF: Gaining Tejada and Matsui > losing Burke, Bruntlett, and Adam Everett. Signing Matsui made Burke expendable, and Everett was canned after the Tejada deal. However, we took on about $15MM in salary with this exchange, so it did come with a substantial opportunity cost on the rest of the roster. Still, an easy win.

OF: Losing Scott, Anderson > gaining Bourn. Sorry, but this is pretty easy. Yes, we do gain team speed and, obviously, we get better D in CF. But, this isn’t enough to off-set the difference in runs produced between Scott and Bourn. It was the Lidge trade that made Scott available.

SP: Losing Gutierrez, Albers, Patton > well, nothing. Huge losses here. One can say, wait, we signed Shawn Chacon! We could’ve signed Chacon regardless. Even with Patton’s injury, we do not have two arms like Gutierrez and Albers outside of Nieve. Tremendously adverse impact on our depth.

RP: Losing Lidge, Qualls, Sarfate > gaining Geary, Valverde, Villareal. Lidge is, and will be, better than Valverde. One can talk about how Lidge was necessary to get Bourn, but I don’t think that deal was positive. Villareal makes it close, but the dude has got to keep the ball in the yard.

Summary: Yes, we got a helluva lot better offensively at SS and defensively at 2b, but at what price? Our OF is weaker, out pitching is thinner, and our relievers are explosive. Sure, one *could* say we did a heckuva job shuffling the deck chairs on the Titanic, but I still believe these moves mean a net negative.

It’s not even three weeks into the season, though, and I am just some damn blogger in his mother’s basement who doesn’t really enjoy baseball because I look at stats (this has a point).

Source for trade info: mlb.com

Note: The format came out kinda funky. If this bothers you, please let me know.

When I signed on to do this blog as the only Indians fan among a bunch of Astros and Cardinals fans, I thought it was going to be awesome.  “Self,” I said to myself, “you are going to get to gloat all summer about how your team is awesome and their teams suck more ass than an Amazonian butt leach. (Author’s note: I have no idea if such a creature exists, but, if it does, it is almost certainly Amazonian in nature.)

Fast forward to April 18, 2008.  Though the Tribe throttled the Tigers last night, 11-1, and moved out of last place in the division, Cleveland still finds itself with a less-than-stellar 6-10 record, matching the Astros start (despite being roughly 188361282456 times better than Houston).  Even worse, C.C. Sabathia’s ERA is climbing faster than his cholesterol and Joe Borowski’s inflamed vagina has already caused him to blow three saves.

Rather than dwell on the bad stuff, however, I am going to force myself to come up with ten positive things about this team.  Not sure if it can be done, but here we go.

1. Detroit is even worse right now, meaning that we are ahead of the one team in the Central that people thought might beat us.
2. My prediction that Cliff Lee would return to form is looking brilliant, as he is 2-0 with an ERA smaller than Miggy Tejada’s steroid-laced nuts.
3. Francisco Liriano is, apparently, not the second-coming of Johan Santana.
4. Ryan Garko is hitting the ball hard, hitting for average, AND not striking out much.  These things all make baby jesus smile.
5. While C.C. might suck suck, Carmona is still The Truth.
6. JoBo is on the DL, meaning I can rest easier at night.  I’d rather swim through a vat of used hypodermic needles than have to rely on that turd to get three outs.
7. The next six games are against Minnesota and KC, meaning we can make up ground quickly if we put together a little run.  I am already calling tonight’s contest (Lee v. Liriano) a win.
8. I did mention that Borowski would not be pitching any time soon, didn’t I?  Oh well, it warrants repeating.  He makes Jose Valverde look like the GOOD Brad Lidge.
9. Travis Hafner seems to have re-found the power that left him last season.  By which I mean steroids, of course.
10. Given the talent on this team, we can still honestly believe that we will win the division and make the postseason.  That’s a nice feeling to have.

Wow.  I actually did it.  Things must not be quite as bad as I was thinking.  Now, if you’ll excuse me, I am off to find some ebola to help CC drop weight.

Jose de Jesus Ortiz, quite possibly the only chron writer who doesn’t make me physically ill (and I rather enjoy him, actually), reports today that Miguel Tejada, that beacon of righteousness, is a big fat liar. OK, perhaps I’m being harsh (duh!). I do agree with Ortiz’ blog-based sentiment that, perhaps, lying wasn’t such a bad thing. And, all of his legal documents show his correct age. However, this should have all been cleared up many years ago, at least by the Age-Gate controversy, but it wasn’t.

In one of my first posts on this nascent blog, I expressed doubt about Tejada’s age. Doubts as to Tejada’s age have been around for several years. Considering the normal peak for hitters is between 26-30 years old, adding two years to his age makes his career path follow historical patterns more closely.

So what? Blah blah blah, bfd, you calloused old under-sexed alcoholic bitter old MF, what does this mean to me?

To put it in perspective, instead of having him tied up over his age 32 and 33 seasons, it’s now his 34 and 35 seasons. And, now that we are in the post-roid era, we’ll have a more normal player production curve. Offensively, we know that players have a tendency to tail off after their age 32 season.

Last year was Tejada’s lowest OPS since his 2001 season, but he also showed a considerable power drop-off. Adding two years means that this is more likely a trend - the declining numbers - than it was a statistical variance.

Finally, let me add that Ed Wade deserves even more scrutiny after this deal. Pulling the trigger the day before the Mitchell Report, and then likely knowing Tejada’s correct age, is poor management. You can try to convince me otherwise, but good luck. It was this deal that soured me on the Stros’ hopes for the season, and now I’m closer to flat-out pissed.

————————

In today’s action, the Astros staff gave up four HRs in an ugly effort today. Miggy celebrated his pair of birthday’s today by homering, as well. I wonder if he gets two cakes?

Wednesday nights are tough for me - it’s an important family night - so I didn’t get to see the game yesterday. But how nice was it to see some goose eggs on Roy’s linescore? The Phillies, even without Rollins, are a solid offensive squad. Yesterday’s outing was a boost for me (and, you know, it’s really all about me).

Edit: Nate Silver re-ran Tejada’s PECOTA projections after adding on two years (sub required).  The take away is that there is not a huge difference in his 2008 numbers - though it’s not statistically insignificant, but the new age lowers his overall value 40% from here on out.  That’s the performance curve drop-off I talk about above.

With today’s win, the Stros are 5-8. Wandy thinks he’s Sandy Koufax, which is all good, but there’s still something wrong with Roy. So, after a little hiatus from the blog, here’s this week’s edition of Rights and Wrongs.

Rights: Offense:

Lance: Oh yeah, no first half power slump for the man this year. And, just to prove he doesn’t have old player’s skills, he has 3 SBs, as well.

Tejada: Who knew? Except for everybody but me. I am still extremely skeptical of his ability to produce, but he’s making me look like a total dumbass…which is fine.

JR Towles: He could be here under the premise of “Not Brad Assmass” alone, but he hit his 3rd bomb of the season today and drew his 6th walk. The average may suck, but that doesn’t really matter when you are hitting for power and drawing walks.

Carlos Lee: Three bombs to start the year. Yummy.

Pitching:

Wandy: Wow. I kinda called this one, based on his K-rate spike last year, but he has been outstanding this year. In addition, he’s going deeper into games. He’s had some helpful matchups, but this start has the smell of legitimacy.

Wrongs: Offense:

Hunter Pence: Nuf ced.

Michael Bourn: OK, my bad: I jinxed him. After seeing some considerable improvement in his offensive game, he had a crappy week. Frankly, I think I know part of the problem: he’s the most dead-red hitter I’ve seen since Vinny Castilla. If it ain’t a fastball, he can’t touch it. The 2 XBH in 42 ABs doesn’t give me warm fuzzies, either.

“Proven Hitters” Loretta, Wiggington, and Erstad: Loretta was once a good hitter, but he’s pretty much done. Erstad and Wiggington never were good hitters, and they are getting too many ABs.

Pitching:

Backe: What? How can I say that a guy with a 2.25 ERA is a Wrong? For the simple fact that his PeripheralERA is a lot closer to 6.00 than 2.25.

Chacon: More BB than K. I know it’s only two starts, but there’s no reason to expect that ratio to change.

Roy: Wow. 30 HA in 16 IP. 5 HR. After getting ripped by the Marlins (the MF MARLINS!!!) on Friday, it’s officially time to panic.

Summary: You may think I’m seeing the 5-8 record half empty, and you’re right. Here’s what I see (all stats through Saturday).

Our offense is 3rd to last in AVG, 2nd to last in OBP, and 11th in SLG. In other words, we really are a slow-pitch softball team with a bunch of guys too fat to run all the way to first in a sprint (like me!).

As for pitching, we’ve given up the most hits, we’re second to last in WHIP, and we are in the lower half in ERA. What that says to me is that we still have a considerable way to go to catch up with our WHIP, which means we look worse in runs given up. AND, considering the relation between hits and defense, we really may not improve in this area.

I guess I’m kinda hard-wired to not be overly optimistic. I tend to look at things from an objective viewpoint. And, right now, I see a pretty shitty team, and I see no reason to think that extending our 5-8 start to a 100-loss season is unreasonable.

In no way did I want this to be my first post here.  I envisioned something more epic and creative, but I cannot let this stand.  While I do not believe that sports figures have to be role models, and I believe parents should parent their own children, the PSA in the title is just good information.  Bernie Miklasz, a writer for St. Louis Today.com (St. Louis Dispatch) wrote a simply awful piece of garbage yesterday.  I am a baseball purist in just about every sense of the word.  I think batters should get beaned if they crowd the plate.  I believe if you are man enough to deliver that beaning you should be man enough to fight over it.  I believe a second baseman in the base path with the ball is fair game.  I even believe that a catcher blocking the plate should get railroaded.  I do not, however, subscribe to the idea that sliding into a guy who is looking away and gave you the plate should in any way be okay.  I also believe that Tony LaRussa is evil, but that’s a topic for another conversation later.  What Pujols did was wrong, he apologized for it, and Brandon Backe called him on it.  It was over in my book.  But for a columnist to say it was okay, and to even encourage more of it?  That’s unthinkable.  You do not hit a man from behind, and you do not hit a man trying to stop you from getting nailed with a ball while you are sliding into home on a plate that was in no way blocked. 

 I was at the game and in the bang bang situation I didn’t think Pujols did much wrong, but this picture says it all:

Knee out, elbow out, looking right at his legs.  Albert knew what he was doing.  I don’t believe he intended to hurt Towles, but he certainly meant to take him out.  Either way, being tough is one thing, being dirty is another.  I’m giving Pujols the benefit of the doubt, his teammate told him to slide, and there is only one reason to slide and that is if a play at the plate is imminent.  For me, that means take out the catcher and I wouldn’t put it past LaRussa to tell his player to get Albert down even when it wasn’t necessary.

An open letter to Hunter Pence:

Hey Hunter,

Feeling comfy?  Still pulling small pieces of glass out of your legs and arms?  Look, we need to talk.  I loved watching you last year, when you were all piss and vinegar and running into walls and stuff.  Your enthusiasm was something I hadn’t seen since Craig Biggio was still Craig Biggio, and the fact that you were shaping up to be a .300/20 kind of guy was damn fine.  There were concerns about your ability to hit a breaking ball, but I figured that you’d adapt to that just like you’ll eventually adapt to opening closed doors before going through them.

But what the hell is going on, Spaz? You’re batting .179 as of today, with ten strikeouts and no walks.  NO. WALKS.  Your plate approach right now is worse than Carl Landry’s free throw form. When the ‘Stros signed Kaz Matsui and his fissures, he was intended to be the #2 hitter, but when his butt trouble intervened, Coop tapped you for that lineup spot.  A lot of people were worried when we signed Kaz, because he’s an injury risk, and he has a massage therapist and all that, but he’s an ideal second hitter because he can hit behind a runner and move people up.  Especially since Michael Bourn is faster than a Saturn V rocket, any well-placed contact could create a scoring opporutunity.  Barring that, a walk brings up the Puma and the heart of the lineup. 

Kaz can do all of those things, Hunter.  Coop thought you could too, but now you’re flailing like the T-1000 in the molten steel, Bourn’s getting stranded on base, and the boppers are getting fewer pitches to hit.  It’s killing this supposedly potent lineup, Spaz.  At this point, Towles or Loretta would be a better fit for the two hole until the anal fissures are healed. 

But I still have some shred of faith that you’ll bring this around.  I don’t want you to stand like a statue at the plate, refusing to swing.  That’s what Morgan Ensberg did, and now he’s picking A-Rod’s dingleberries in the Bronx.   In case you haven’t figured it out, the opposing pitcher’s job is not to give you something that you can hit into the Crawford Boxes; he’s trying to get you out, preferably without giving you a chance to advance a runner or do anything productive.  Lately, you’ve made some dumb-ass pitchers look like that cheater Jake Peavy.   Hurt them before they hurt you, you lanky bastard; just remember that hurting them doesn’t mean swinging like freaking El Kabong at every opportunity.

I’ve tried logic, and I’ve tried cajoling.  If this keeps up, all I’ve got left is bribery and threats of physical harm.  Maybe if I put Marissa Miller on the other side of a sliding glass door, I could do both at once.  Let’s hope it doesn’t come to that: I don’t want to see you hurt, and Marissa’s been having such a great time in my basement.

Sincerely,

Ted Striker

St. Louis Cardinals (5-1) @ Houston Astros (2-5)

Round 1:

Todd Wellemeyer (1-0) 

v.

Wandy Rodriguez (0-0)

Well, it sure didn’t take long for all of us to jump into our first series match-up since we started this here thing we call WTP.  Luckily for me, I have the advantage of being able to gloat just a little as our teams sit at opposite ends of the NL Central standings going into tonight’s game.  5-1?!?  WOW!  What a start!  Yes, as I stated here, I truly believed that these Cardinals would fair much better than what most of the so-called experts were predicting–mainly because I believed that Rick Ankiel’s hitting from last year was no fluke, thought our middle infield would fair far better as a whole (y’all don’t realize the intense hatred I had for that little league “shortstop” we carried for far too long), still thought we had the best bullpen in the division, and really loved the way we competed and won game after game to close out Spring Training.  But this?!?  The best starting pitching in the league after Week 1?!?  Granted, it’s only Week 1 and the starters will eventually come back to earth, not to mention we had the luxury of opening our season at Busch II, but I certainly could not have dreamed of a better start to the ‘08 campaign. 

So, other than the phenomenal performances turned in by this makeshift rotation, who else has impressed?  Obviously, it’s Rick Ankiel.  This mancrush is just getting out of hand now.  The guy just continues to come up big in clutch situations, hit for power, and his success versus lefties is something that I didn’t see coming.  His outfield defense has even been far better than first advertised; his catch in the 8th inning yesterday was Jimmy Edmonds-esque (minus the bad first step).  Adam Kennedy, at least so far, looks much more like the guy that played in Anaheim, er, Los Angeles, er whateverthefuck (as opposed to the assclown that showed up last year).  Kyle McClellan, the local St. Louis product, is proving to have a lot of grit and guts coming out of the ‘pen as he offsets not having Russ Springer down there with Ryan Franklin setting up for Izzy.  And Brian Barton, the Rule 5 castaway from Matty’s Indians, has continued to hit and may have even bumped Skip Schumaker from the leadoff and starting outfield spot.  Hell, LaRussa even went with the same exact line-up yesterday that he used the day before!  All this Redbird talk and I didn’t even have to mention that Pujols guy.  Amazing stuff so far!

**Update: Troy Glaus is still a big flappin’ pussy, but at least he’s turned in some decent glove work the past two games. 

So, what’s up with those Stros besides injuries to Berkman and Wigginton, being completely owned by Derek Lee over the weekend, and Your Boy Roy giving up 21 hits in his first two starts?  The one-run losses have to be frustrating–looks like you guys have been in every game this year.  Any anal fissures updates?  Tejada is actually lookin’ good out there for ya.