Thanks for joining me here in part two, which is really just part 1A of an obscenely long post I felt like breaking into two. What’s really the problem with the Astros? As I suggested earlier, it’s a combination of McLane’s overbearing personality which led to the hiring of problem number two, Special Ed.

It starts at the top with Drayton. You can’t completely begrudge the work he’s done – he introduced a modicum of stability and success into a franchise that had lost its way. He saved the franchise from being moved in the early 90s. That being said, the best owners keep a watchful eye on their franchise but leave the iron fist at home. Not so with Drayton and I think this is best illustrated by two problems. First, the Hunsicker departure. For once, Dickie Justice is right – running Hunsicker out of town was a terrible idea. He’s responsible for our one and only World Series appearance and (just look at the Devil Rays) clearly knows what he’s doing. You keep that sort of talent around even if you disagree with him at times.

The other is Drayton’s spending. Consider his absolute insistence on sticking to Bud (rot in hell you piece of shit) Selig’s asinine slot-money system. IF everyone played by the rules, there might be some merit to it. But they don’t. Big teams spend big money on the best talent to keep their systems fresh and loaded. How do you think the Red Sox have a 1^st place team AND a top-flight farm system? Spend at ALL levels of the franchise. But not Drayton. Here, we’ll give Dickie Justice credit for his only other salient point – McLane will save money by not signing our top picks, and then splash big money on Woody Williams and/or Shawn Chacon. How can you justify not signing a five-tool player who’s demanding first round money (even though he slipped to the 5/6/7 round) and then sign Carlos Lee to that monstrosity of a contract? Fuck. Me. Sideways.

Problem number two is – and I feel like I’m beating a dead horse here – Special Ed. When taking over a team in flux, you’re faced with two decisions – scrap it and start over, or build an instant winner. He didn’t really do either. He traded our most valuable asset (Brad Lidge) for a failed speedster HE drafted in Philadelphia – then traded core pieces of our bullpen and infield for a combustible closer. So the bullpen is now weaker and you essentially traded for Willy Taveras v2.0. And don’t even ask me about the Tejada trade.

Now you’ve put the franchise in the following position. The clubhouse is brand new, lacking chemistry, and probably already divided into camps based on who’s a Wade guy and who’s not. All you’ve really done is reshuffle the deckchairs on the Titanic and blatantly ignored the gapping hole in the line-up: namely no pitching what so ever. To cap it off, you’ve got a rookie manager in his first full season at the helm of a totally different team, a mix of vets and young guys, burdened with the expectation to win because of the money you’ve spent and moves you’ve made. None of this seems like a recipe for success to me – you’ve put your manager in an untenable position.

Combine with this the fact that there’s nothing in the system or on the roster for you to use if the situation (predictably) goes sour. You’re boxed into a corner – you’ve kinda sorta built a team to win, but not really and cleared out an already depleted farm system in the process. (I’m ignoring the fact that the GM is also so unprofessional that he allows a heated situation to escalate to violence.)

How does a team go from the World Series to complete chaos in three years, Dickie? Simple. Your despotic owner runs the architect for success out of town, replaces him with an incompetent “yes man” and then replaces HIM with the dog and pony show of a snake-oil salesman.

The solution is long and painful, and will require Drayton to tuck is ego aside and refocus on the franchise he built. Start by firing Ed Wade. Then hire someone with the pedigree of or exposure to building a franchise from the inside. I suggest a fresh face like Kim Ng of the Dodgers. Move whoever you can for whatever you can get – this means getting something for Tejada and if you can find someone to take Lee’s bloated contract, do it. Yes it will be 10cents on the dollar. (Sidenote: if you trade Oswalt or Berkman I will blow a gasket.) Start infusing the farm system with fresh blood and talent – that will require spending on it. If you’re that sold on Cooper, give him some time to learn on the go and mesh with the new (ideally young) team. If not, find a manager who can work with a young team.

Then let the healing process commence. It’ll take a few years. And it wont be pretty. But the foundation has to be relayed for the franchise to succeed, and that’s not going to happen in its current state. There is no quick fix to this!

It’s hard to be completely objective when the franchise you love more than anything in sports is in freefall. But I think my general assessment is pretty close to the mark. At least it looks good after a bleach martini at lunch.